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Sadomasochism: inflicting and receiving pain, often to produce sexual excitement. See also: domination. Masochism, SM, S&M, S/M.
Slave - adomasochistic vernacular term for the masochistic partner whose role is one of total subservience and obedience. Synonym bottom; Antonyms, master; dominatrix; top.
BDSM is a word composed from the following abbreviations: B&D (Bondage & Discipline), D&S (Dominance & submission) and S&M (Sadism & Masochism). It means, that it can cover a play, where heavy pain is inflict or tight bonds are applied or where one person drive another. There is one sign common for all three: there is at least one person, who lead the scene (called top), and at least one person, who is controlled (called bottom). Bondage & Discipline - bonds, humilitation and corporal punishment are used to control the behaviour of the bottom. The top forces the bottom to achieve a certain goal through the given rules. If these are broken, then punishment takes a place. It is very similar to a child treatment used in last centuries, but applied on adults of course. Very often role playing such as parents/children, teacher/student is a part of it. Dominance & submission - the top dominates the bottom. The top demands that the bottom wants to obey. It is similar to B&D, but the control is mostly in an emotional field. Let me give you an example to make it more clear: The top gives a command to the sub to keep the house clean. In B&D the top will check, if the house is really clean. If not, her crop will have a work to do ... In D&S the top will not care if the room is tidied up, but if the bottom has spent enough effort to fulfil the request. Sadism & Masochism - pain is involved. The masochist likes to receive pain, the sadist likes to inflict pain. BDSM can be a lifestyle, it can be a favourite game regularly played with a partner, or it can be something what would be never understand by some. The most of BDSMers say, that erotic power exchange is the most sensual thing you can experience.
Being Submissive. The person who is exerting the most control during a Slave/Master relationship is usually the slave, as the slave controls what happens. A woman who envisions herself being a submissive or slave is creating a scenario where she is not in control of what happens, but her needs are always met. In the fantasy, the master always does what the slave wants. This is another form of "Surrender of Control."